I’m currently enrolled in a Public Speaking course. Our latest assignment: Create a mission statement for yourself. “There is no correct or incorrect format for your mission statement.” was the only instruction my professor gave the class. So here it is:
This is my life. Sipping coffee alone after finishing a shift at the library, simply because there is nothing else to do. I suppose I should be happy that my class is cancelled. I guess I am, but it creates an awkward time gap. I’m stuck on campus for two extra hours. It would be a waste of gas/time to drive half an hour home, and then half an hour back. But I didn’t bring any of my homework with me, so it’s a waste of time here in the coffee shop, too. It’s really not so bad, just that I hate waiting. I wish I worked extra hours today, just so I could feel useful.
It’s becoming clear to me that I need to meet more people. Or rather, once I meet them, make an effort to see them outside of school/class/the library. It would be a whole lot easier if I lived on campus. But I’m sick of complaining, I just wish I had something to do. I think I need a boyfriend or something.
I’m loving the education I’m getting. I’m being presented with challenges I’ve either never experienced, or need more experience with. In-depth dissection and discussion of the Bible, and public speaking in particular. I’m so excited to be more comfortable around people, with people, and in front of people. I can feel that it’s already started. Working as a clerk at the library, working as a tele-counselor, taking a public speaking course, being a mass communications major, and most of all being able to make my own decisions and be my own person without outside influence or persuasion are helping me to become the person I’ve always wanted to be, and really am inside. I don’t even care that that sentence is really messed up and hard to follow, I just feel relieved from being honest.
Realizing these things is making me re-evaluate some of my past friendships with the wrong kind of people. People who, with their bad attitudes and constant negativity, held me back in life. I guess though that I’m not perfectly blameless. I let it happen. I only protested in my own mind, creating an incredible 5-year-anger that I’ve only just now been able to solve. I’m trying not to be so mad all the time, and trying not to be the pessimist I’ve involuntarily become. I don’t think people really see it on the outside, but if they could read my mind, they’d see a disagreeable person locked up in my brain. And I absolutely hate it. I probably feel mad more than any other emotion. But I don’t want to be mad anymore, because it has held me back from being open, personable, and honest.
I think that’s why, for most of my life, I’ve preferred to be alone. Because when I’m alone, I can truly be who I want. I don’t have to painfully compose my face into a scowl or false smile. It causes headaches. When I’m alone, I can sing, I can talk, I can draw, I can joke and not be so worried that someone may not like me. That’s how I want to be with other people. I just want to be myself. I want to be the best person I am capable of, because I want to make eternal friends wherever I go.
I take comfort in the fact that I’m on my way.
When I wrote this, it wasn’t with the goal of creating my mission statement. I just started writing and it inadvertently became one of the most honest things I’ve written in a while.
What is your mission statement? If this assignment had been given to you, how would you have presented your mission statement? A word? A sentence? A poem? An art piece? I’d really like to know.